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Sleeping Beauty

PUURRR TO YOU,  MY FRIENDS!

I hoep you have all enjoyed The Christmas palaver!

Well, Christmas has of course BEEN and GONE and I have actually had a really good time. APART  from wearing a silly red hat with an even siller white round ball attached to it! I am posting a picture of another kitty  modelling this hat  as I refuse to show myself in such wickedly unattractive attire:

See his expression of digust?`Yes, this is EXACTERLEY how I feel about this stupid outfit! My mom put one of these red and white things on her head  too- on Christmas Day when she was handing out our pressies. She called herself “Mrs Claus” – CAN YOU IMAGINE!!! That’s what wearing one of those  silly hats does to you- turns your head so you think you are someone competely different! “Mrs Claus indeed”! Well, “Mr Claus” can beat it and find himself a wife elsewhere coz our Mom is already otherwise engaged! Luckily she is back to being our MOM again so the lunacy was just temporary…And of course she gave us all some real nice pressies…

And some lovely roast turkey with some yummy gravy….

Purrrrrrrr!

So it was quite pleasant actually…..

One real grand thing about Christmas and the holidays is that we can have loooooooong lie ins in the mornings. Our Mom is on vacation so she does not have to rush up at the crack of dawn to rush off to work. It is the BEST Christmas pressie of all to snuggle up in bed with my mom and sleep and sleep and sleep! And I just read on the Internet that sleep is one of the BEST beauty treatments in the world. And of course one of the cheapest!!! So I think that the phrase “Sleeping beauty” means sleeping yourself more beautiful or handsome.

Of course I am already a VERY handsome cat boy already! But when I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror right now I wondered who that strikingly attractive cat was!

Guess what?

It was ME!

Honestly- I WON’T RECOGNIZE MYSELF by the end of ths vacation! I will become a babe magnet! SelmaViktoria will get crazy in love and so will my Mom! Not to mention all my female readers here!

Hihihiiiii! I am really looking forward to my magical effect on all you birds- and imagine that it will  simply due to being a “SLEEPING BEAUTY”!

HERKULES

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HAVEN’T GOT A CLUE WINE!

Hi all ye faithfuls!

Sorry for the delay in updating  but I have been kept pretty darned busy on these dark and short December days! Appart from sleeping, eating and taking care of my mom I have been kept on my paws with other stuff that has been going on… You know, the INVASION of the Christmas decorations!

YES -this is the time of year when boxes are being dug out of storage spaces and lots of really strange objects keep coming out of the woodwork. It is VERY important that  Charlie, Selma and myself  keep an eye on what is going on so that we are not taken by suprise by the anticks of a silly wooden snowman or a nasty looking gnome with a sack of something on his back! And then there is an armada of reindeer that we have to keep occupied so that they don’t start flying through the windowpane up into the sky. Ho-ho-ho guys, no flying until Christmas Day! That is when Santa will be needing you to help him get around in his sleigh with all those interesting boxes covered in paper and strng! Pressies are just begging to be opened ASAP, don’t you agree???But I suppose we must be patient and wait for Santa to deliver. BIG YAAAAAAWN!

BTW I have had to start pep-talking one of those reindeer. His name is Rudolph and he has very poor self confidence so I have been having lots of chats with him -in the dark as he is very shy. I have got BIG plans for him so keep your paws crossed that I will get him to kick some butt! SOON, very SOON!

Now what I really wanted to write about here- move over from the keyboard now,MOM- is a strange bottle right here on the desk. It is filled with something so disgusting that I can hardly bear to write about it. Yes, it is truly DISGUSTING, Mom!!!!

Whatever is in the bottle, you are of course wondering! I will give you a clue- Glue!

Have you ever heard of Glue wine? I hope you have because I hope that my mom is not totally alone in being insane enough to drink and even SMILE when she is drinking the stuff. Pleeese let other moms and dads do this so that I can hold my whiskers high again

SO- do you recognize this bottle?

The liquid inside this bottle is totally and utterly DISGUSTING! I thought that mom had pretty good taste in food and drink ( with a few tiny exceptions) but now I have changed my mind. Miaaaaaaaaaaauuuu! Miauuuuuuuuu! Miauuuuuuuuu! Yes, I keep telling her with my voice and even slapping her with my paw! But she ignores my protests and even looks  pleased when she lifts the glass to her lips. I am worried she might get poisoned but after 5 bottles she seems pretty ok. I  mean as far as humans can ever be ok…..

On top of everything the glue wine is to be drank warm! And when my mom puts it into a saucepan on the stove and it starts  getting hot  the whole appartment suddenly smells of strange spices and alcohol. Yes, my whole body shudders as I write these words.

Please, mom, don’t you understand that Water is the best thing in the world to drink?COOL WATER is a fantastic delicious drink. It makes you bright, sparkly and beautiful.  When will you learn that cats know best when it comes to culinary matters?

Cheers, felines, I am off for a nice long drink of lovely fresh water. I need to revive my spirits after seeing my mom sitting on the coach looking happy with have’t got a clue wine!

HERKULES

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A little tribute to MJ

My mom wrote this little tribute to Michael Jackson and I am putting it on my blog because I like the idea that MJ might have transformed himself into a horse instead of the usual panther. Less scary for me LOL! I think it is funny with him dancing in the moonlight and I feel that I like the dude in dressage mode!
Go, MJ, Go!!!
 Copyright 2010 All rights reserved by Titania James
MIDNIGHT FANTASY

Blue moon shines down upon a tree
Dude on branch looks up and “See”,
he winks and thinks :
“someone in the dark for me!”

Happy moonshine hugs the tree
and dude with tune
starts drumming Speechless
and a bit of Gone too soon!

Horse with glittery socks
Starts to rock and trot,
dancing and twirling in the round-
Someone that was lost is now found.
But such a surprise-
this sensual disguise!

Horse mimes and leans and prances
performing many Off the Wall dances,
A speechless canter,
A breakdance until dawn.
Then he dips his hat and hiccups:
“Hey, moonshine , your butt is mine!
For all time!”

banter, cats, felines, humour, Uncategorized

WINTER WONDERLAND

 

WINTER WONDERLAND

I went to bed and slept- and woke up to a W H I T E  world!

I am lying in the window on my soft white cushions looking out on a winter wonderland.  It is midday and the sun is busy shining and the snow is glittering. It looks very beautiful- and magical!

BUT- I am soooo grateful and pleeesed to be an indoor guy when it is W-I-N-T-E-R! And so is my cat family! SelmaViktoria had to go and have her photograph taken earlier today  and she said it was not NICE being outdoors when you were used to a warm and snuggly apartment. She boasted about how warm and cosy it was inside her bag where she sat wrapped in a woollen cardigan and muffler- but I caught her shivering a bit when she and my MOM returned.

I love having my photograph taken- I am a natural in front of the camera. But I demand that the photographer comes to my place so I don’t have to go outside. I am a true professional if allowed to pose at casa mia. I guess you all know what I am talking about.

I suppose you felines are interested in how Selma’s photo session went….Well, my MOM will be a guest on here later this month so she will tell you all about it. The photos will be  arriving any day now so it will be fun to take a peak. Without SelmaViktoria catching me sneak peaking- OF COURSE!!!

Magical winter wonderland means seeing but not touching. Keeping my paws safely indoors and avoiding horrid cold draughts from windows and doors. It means dark and long and lovely mornings  in my MOM’s bed, snuggling up under the covers and snoozing happily all the way to Neverland.

And soon it will be Christmas giftie time. 

Because winter wonderland means loads  of parcels, wrapping paper, string and cuddly toys.

I think Santa loves me to bits- and I can’t blame him. After all, I am really and truly adorable, don’t you guys agree?

 

 

P-U-R-R-R-R-R

HERKULES